Everything will change eventually, no matter how firmly you believe that certain things or people will remain the same forever. Sometimes, it’s hard to accept that things aren’t as they used to be—but that’s life.
Maybe it’s your relationship, family, or friends. As we grow up, we may find it harder to get close to others, or we slowly drift apart from people who once meant a lot to us.
Yes, it’s uncomfortable, upsetting, and sorrowful when everything—or the world around you—suddenly feels unfamiliar. People come and go, and no one seems to stay with you for a long time. The old ones leave, and the new ones will leave eventually too.
I still remember that after graduation, my best friend and I couldn’t see each other often because we both moved to different cities. We promised to keep in touch no matter how busy we got. But when I saw her post a picture online with her new friend, I felt jealous and betrayed. For a long time, I didn’t talk to her or even send a message to ask how she was doing. Just like that, we drifted apart without saying goodbye—like we silently agreed that what had happened was final, and there was no need to stay in touch.
For a long time, things like this kept happening. Friends and colleagues became strangers. Even my sibling didn’t feel like the same person they were two years ago—it felt like a stranger had shown up and said, “Hey, I’m your sister.” I had no idea what was happening. It was like everything changed before I even noticed, and I wasn’t prepared for it.
But when I reflected on all of this, I realized that maybe I’m the one who changed the most. I’m not the same person I was five years ago. I’ve changed completely, and I didn’t even realize it. One of the biggest changes was that I used to reject anything outside of my interests. I didn’t like talking to strangers or getting to know new people because I thought it was a waste of time.
However, after meeting different people, experiencing new cultures, and going through many things, I found it exciting and meaningful. I got to understand other people’s lives, and that helped expand my perspective. Through these experiences, I also learned more about myself. I realized that if I dislike certain behaviors or types of people, I can use that awareness to remind myself not to be like that.
Although change can be uncomfortable, it’s also an opportunity to “shed your old skin.” Every change can guide you toward where you’re meant to be and help you become the person you’re capable of being.
Here are three sentences I learned and really liked from the book The Mountain Is You by Brianna Wiest:
“You must release your old self into the fire of your vision and be willing to think in a way you have never tried before.”
“You must mourn the loss of your younger self, the person who has gotten you this far but who is no longer equipped to carry you onward.”
“One day, this mountain will be behind you, but who you become in the process of getting over it will stay with you always.”